Me, Myself, But No I
by Fatcat91
Summary: Leo's fooled them for years. He hid behind the Leader and the older brother, and protector. Now his brother's want Leo but he can't be found. How can something be when it had never existed.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

 **Rating:** T for teen

 **Author's Notes:** This was a writing exercise in writing a chapter without a letter from the alphabet. I chose the letter I. It is going to be disjointed because it is more like a stream of consciousness. This is unbeted so all spelling and grammar mistakes are mine. Without further ado.

Me, Myself But No I

They named me Leo. They called me Leader. They wanted someone strong and capable. They wanted someone to protect them and lead them. They wanted someone who could do no wrong, who was perfect. Leader was strong and capable and perfect and led them to safety, and Leo just protected them and loved them. They needed Leader. They wanted Leader. They got Leader.

They needed me to save them. They forgot to let me be myself, me . . . Me needed, no wanted to be forgotten and Myself was left somewhere. The somewhere where thoughts are left and dreams go to fade. The only ones left were Leo and Leader. But Leo was long dead, destroyed by Leader.

They saw, well one saw. He attempted to save Me, to save Myself and to save Leo, but only Leader was left. The one who saw sobbed that day. The anger he normally had was gone. The rage washed away by fear and sadness and horror. He stayed though. He stayed and kept up the search for Me, Myself and Leo. The one who saw hated Leader, because Leader never cared. Leader never loved.

The others saw too, eventually. After the red one, the one who saw fought Leader. They wanted Leo back. They refused to understand that Leo was gone, dead destroyed. Me and Myself had been gone too long to ever be brought back. They often stared at Leader, the beady eyes always full of hope for Leo, or Me or Myself to return.

Too late, Leader wants to say, you are too late. He does not speak. The old one, the one who created Leader, looks at Leader, eyes full of knowledge, Knowledge that Leader won't ever leave. For how can a father un-create a son?

The happy one saw too after the red one told everyone. The orange one, the happy one, couldn't; no wouldn't understand. He had not wanted to at the start. He was told over and over that Leo, Me, Myself was gone and that they would not, could not get them back. The happy one was not happy after that. No more laughs, no more pranks. Always frowns.

The Smart one was the last to know. He refused to hear, to understand. He was just too smart to trust the others. He understood when Leader destroyed the Red one. The purple one had accepted that Leo was gone when he had to mop up the red one's blood. He attempted to coax Leo back, to coax Me and Myself, but they were gone. Only the unmoved Leader stayed.

They lessened Leader's burdens. No more work outs, no more patrols. They played and talked to Leader. They asked for Leader's . . . Leo's thoughts. They got Leaders thought. They taught Leader how to draw and found Me through the art. They fed Me paper and brushes, the staple. Me laughed and sobbed, and yelled. Me drew death and blood and damage. They looked for Leo through the wreckage of paper and brushes.

They taught Me and Leader the sword dances. The dances were of Death and messes long forgotten. They don't go to the surface anymore. Myself was found among the sword dances. Myself was calm and understood how for years they looked for Leo. Myself surfaced more and more through the sword dance. The slash of the blade, the balance of the posture was all done by Myself.

They wanted to replace Leader, to get Leo, Myself, and Me back, but they never found Leo. They never would get Leo. Leo can never be found. They recovered Me and Myself but they would never get Leo, because Leader had destroyed Leo, for them, for the team. They would always have Me and Myself but they would never have I, because I had never existed. Leo had never existed.

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Keep on Reading

Fatcat


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